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Understanding 'the s word' in homeschooling

Learn about 'The S Word' in homeschooling and how it relates to socialization concerns.
Lisa Thorsen
Written byLisa Thorsen
4 min read
Key takeaways
  • Socialization, often referred to as 'The S Word' in homeschooling, is a common concern among new homeschoolers
  • However, research shows that about 87% of homeschooled children excel in social skills, and many are actively involved in various social activities, making the worry about socialization largely unfounded.

'The S Word' is a term used in homeschooling circles to refer to socialization. It humorously highlights the frequent concern about how homeschooled kids interact with others.

A peer-reviewed study published in Peabody Journal of Education found that homeschooled children are typically well-adjusted socially and score above average on measures of social skills, emotional development, and daily living skills (Richard Medlin, 2013). Research from the National Home Education Research Institute (NHERI) shows that homeschooled students typically score 15 to 25 percentile points higher than public school students on standardized academic achievement tests.

What is 'the s word'?

'The S Word' is a playful way homeschoolers refer to socialization. It’s the common question they get from friends and family: "But what about socialization?" This phrase has become a funny inside joke because it repeats so often. Homeschoolers often anticipate it before it’s even asked. Using 'The S Word' helps lighten the mood about a topic many parents find tiring to discuss repeatedly.

Why it became slang

The question about socialization isn’t just common; it’s the biggest critique of homeschooling. New homeschoolers worry about 'the dreaded S word' even before they start. Meanwhile, those who have been homeschooling for a while could answer it in their sleep. Ironically, they often hear this question while they're busy socializing—like at dance class, in the park, or during sports practice. Referring to socialization as 'The S Word' lets the community poke fun at a silly concern.

The reality behind the concern

This slang comes from a real concern that deserves attention. Research from the National Home Education Research Institute shows that homeschooled kids usually do well socially. About 87% of studies indicate they excel in social skills, self-image, and leadership. With around 3.7 million homeschooled kids in the U.S., many are involved in co-ops, sports, clubs, and volunteer work. For most families, the challenge isn't finding socialization; it’s deciding which activities to skip because there are so many!

How homeschoolers use the term

'The S Word' pops up in various situations. In online groups, you might see someone say, "I got hit with The S Word at Thanksgiving again—anyone have good answers?" At conventions, speakers joke about it, recognizing it as a shared experience. New homeschoolers often express their worries about 'the S thing,' while veterans reassure them it’s not as big of a deal as outsiders think. Knowing what 'The S Word' means creates a sense of belonging; it shows you’ve faced the questions and built confidence in your choice.

The bottom line

'The S Word' highlights a real part of the homeschool journey. One question seems to overshadow everything despite evidence showing homeschooled kids are socially skilled. This term has turned the frustration into humor for the community. If you're new to homeschooling and anxious about 'The S Word', don't worry! You’ll probably find your family busier with social events than you expected. And when someone asks that question at the next family gathering, you’ll be in on the joke.

Frequently Asked Questions

Lisa Thorsen
Written by
Lisa Thorsen

Co-founder, BetterSchool

Lisa is the co-founder of BetterSchool and a homeschool mom of three. BetterSchool administers the largest independent homeschool community in the country — over 350,000 families across all 50 states.

When COVID hit, Lisa and her husband pulled their children out of school and hit the road. Homeschooling wasn't the plan — it was a necessity. But somewhere along the way, the family fell in love with it: the time together, the ability to tailor lessons to each child's interests, learning at their own pace, the freedom to travel, eating healthy on their own schedule, and the countless other benefits that come with homeschooling.

As they traveled, Lisa kept discovering incredible hands-on learning experiences that most homeschool families had no way of finding. She built BetterSchool to make it easy for every family to find and book the experiences that make learning come alive.

Through her community, Lisa has helped hundreds of thousands of parents navigate homeschooling, while also helping local businesses find and serve the homeschool community. She is the former managing partner of a law firm focused on business law and mergers and acquisitions — BetterSchool is her second technology startup. She holds a J.D. from California Western School of Law and a B.A. from Penn State.

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Table of Contents

  • What is 'the s word'?
  • Why it became slang
  • The reality behind the concern
  • How homeschoolers use the term
  • The bottom line
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